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Post by palla on Aug 20, 2003 15:31:58 GMT -5
Oh hell, I just deleted it.  |
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Post by Cobra5 on Aug 20, 2003 16:27:49 GMT -5
...Why?  |
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Post by palla on Aug 20, 2003 16:33:08 GMT -5
Doesn't matter. What's weird is I had a second post up here with links to two stories. Where'd it go? |
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Post by Cobra5 on Aug 20, 2003 16:38:57 GMT -5
Just post it again  |
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Post by palla on Aug 20, 2003 16:45:54 GMT -5
Gypsy Road
By Heather Webb The first time he saw Jaxine was when, as he walked down the street, he happened to look up and into a garden. At that moment, and in all moments after, things were different. * She’d had a dream that something would happen today. Her subconscious had sent her the nighttime vision, illuminated by candlelight, the scent of lilac floating in the air. Rose petals fell in soft showers, which was odd because she smelled lilacs. This reminded her of her garden. All flowers grew there. It seemed that at the mere touch of her hand something would blossom, but she’d never been able to grow her favorite, lilacs. * I’m walking down a tricky street,
Don’t know what’s goin’ on.
Should stop and smell the roses,
But I ain’t got the time.
* Her hair, silky chestnut tresses, was swept back from a gorgeous face, tanned brown by the sun. He couldn’t see her eyes, which were trained on the task at hand. Partially hidden by a tree, he watched Jaxine work her way down the row, planting bulbs one by one in tiny holes, and then covering them with moist, sweet smelling earth. This woman’s garden was a cradle of color, of unrestricted life. Yes there were flower beds, but there were also vines of clematis growing, twining in and out of fence posts. Wild flowers, uncommon even in the somewhat country town, sprang from the grassy surfaces, soft cushions of color clashing yet somehow working at the same time. The perfume of this heaven reached his senses, slowly intoxicating him even from a distance, a paradise that should have been a dream. * The cotton of her yellow sundress blew around her legs, a curtain in the breeze. From the open air porch she retrieved her basket of fresh bulbs she had purchased from a nursery the day before. She didn’t know what life lay within them; she never knew what plants she had buried until their buds showed. The element of surprise just added to the pleasure she received from working in the light, of raising something to maturity. Watching something grow…it created feelings for her that nothing else could. *
I see you, but you don’t see me,
Just so caught up in this life.
Sweet scent, sweet wonder;
Oh milady, what spell have you cast?
* He froze, a summertime winter frost passing over his body. He couldn’t move, breath, think, live. He thought, Oh my lady, oh my love. It was silly to think of what he was, of the love that had been born unbidden in his heart. What desire had wrought this twisted plan? Jaxine, a Faerie of Fauna, was beyond his mortal reach. And yet, hard as he tried, he could not keep himself from watching her. * She had sensed his eyes long ago. The way his gaze gave her body the traditional look-see, but then… Ignoring him with her eyes, she closed her eyes as her hands continued their work almost automatically, and reached out with her other senses. The street she lived on was not terribly wide, and she could hear the young man breathing heavily, skipping a breath every so often. If she were to look up, his face would be flushed, the color of her pink roses. In her mind, she pictured what this man looked like. Her brief view had given her nothing in way of the man’s physical appearance. A prince, she thought, would have the lips of the rose, red and crimson as blood with all the velvet feeling of the petals of this sweet spirit. His eyes…blue as the ocean, cerulean as never seen before. Hair, tumbling in waves of silk, dark as the midnight sky, blacker than ebony. Smiling like the angelic being people thought her to be at times, Jaxine removed her hat. Shaking her hair charmingly and seductively away from her eyes, she looked up and smiled at him. *
Walking down Gypsy Road, I lose myself.
Walking down a tricky street, I fall in love.
Seeing you seeing me, I trip and fall deep,
Deeply in love.
* His heart nearly stopped for the moment, forever, when he met her eyes. They were unlike any he had seen, bizarrely unique in a sense. They were dark, but they were not black, brown, blue, green, any of the ordinary colors. Russet, they were, not something that one could ever hope to see outside of a fairy tale. Perhaps this was what it was, a fairy tale dream where he was dreaming of his princess. Jaxine had a piercing high on her right nostril, which he could only make out because the diamond caught the sunlight, reflecting back in his eyes. This marked her, for that particular piercing marked her as a gypsy, for this was typical for a member of the clan not seen much in the modern world. A Faerie, a Gypsy, a woman…* A Mortal, a Person, a man…*
Sure don’t know what’s goin’ on,
Really don’t care, standing here and now.
Watching you watch me,
I think Gypsy Road’s tricked us,
Tricked us into love. |
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Post by BugHunter on Aug 22, 2003 12:48:36 GMT -5
Gag me with a spoon and shoot me... this story just aint for me... *gags* No offense...
I can actually understand this story. The message is clear and the delivery is good. Its just that...the content... is just... not for guys... Its flowery romance for girls, or gay guys. And the name Jaxine just isn't good.
I mean, this is one of the best works I've seen come out of you, its just wouldn't work for everyone...
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Post by Tassatul on Aug 22, 2003 17:43:17 GMT -5
I thought the books were, well, a little boring. The wording just wasn't good to me, and I didn't make it through the first book. Blasphemer! *Clouds part, and Tassatul, the computer deity, smites Palla with a projectile e-mail* Anywho, some of you know, my favorite book has got to be Dune. Really cool, cause it implements all kinds of cool factors and ideas. This book included religion, sci-fi, all kinds of awesome stuff. Plus, the whole anti-machine thing i always thought was pretty cool, which in turn lead to the ideas about humans replacing computers for reasoning and such. If anyone wants a load of Dune information, id be happy to talk on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on. . . |
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Post by copyKatt on Aug 22, 2003 20:37:03 GMT -5
hah, see your expertise is dune, like wills is planes and ford's is cars. isnt useless information great?  as for your story palla... uhhh... well its discriptive... much... i dunno, its really... flowery. reminds me of the time in "frankenstein" when the auther goes on for 4 pages about how the mountains in Jenevia looked. not really my kinda thing, sorry. |
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Post by Tassatul on Aug 23, 2003 18:03:23 GMT -5
Hey cool, I DO have expertise! Yay!
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Post by hyper4pyropixie on Aug 23, 2003 20:49:24 GMT -5
I like it palla, but of course i am a romantic. It was very discriptive, and any romance lover ( ;D One am, of course one of them.) would love it... But i think you are presenting it to the wrong crowd. From what i see you and me are the only romantics around here. None the of the others would enjoy the fluffy stuff.
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Post by copyKatt on Aug 23, 2003 21:01:31 GMT -5
exactly! i think that what bughunter was trying to get across. haha, to think that the one person here who talks like english was her second langauge got the point across the best yeah, its not badly written or anything, its just that no one here really reads 'fluffy' romance and stuff. |
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Post by BugHunter on Sept 19, 2003 20:55:56 GMT -5
Ok guys, here i have an essay I'd like to hear your opinions about. It was for that practice admission essay i had to do for English. The topic i chose was "Significant event that affected you". What do you think?  9-10-03 On the path through life, with its many winding roads and unknown horizons, one will experience many things that can change him or her in an instant. Or maybe the changes are not that obvious. They may take a while to even be noticeable. They may be just small, tiny changes made in someone’s life. Or they could even be the complete opposite. But I’ll tell you one thing, and it may sound cliché, but the events that took place on 9/11 did affect me in some way. Sure I’m just another guy in the crowd of millions who were also affected by this very tragic incident, and I am sure some of those millions have better stories to tell, but here is my story. It is now exactly two years since these events took to pass and with its remembrance day coming up, I will bet everyone will be taking some time to pause and recollect. Likewise, I will take this moment to remember what it was like on that fateful September day two years ago. “Where were you when 9/11 took place?” Isn’t that the question everyone asks? Well I was in my sophomore English class with my fellow students when I first saw it. Watching the news channel on that day felt so surreal because it was the World Trade Center getting destroyed! A couple of other guys who I talked to later at first thought it was a movie they were watching, however it quickly clicked that it was real and it meant business. Thoughts on my mind were simple – “Holy crap, the Towers are burning!” No one else was thinking about school work either. Reactions to when they were falling down were even worse, of course. I was in pure shock. I never get shocked. I mean, you watch movies and play video games with similar situations and it becomes “seen it all, done it all”, but witnessing it for real… It just changes everything. It couldn’t be real. How could it be real? But it was and everyone had to pay. Even little insignificant me. Losing those two towers wasn’t just losing a business center, it was losing a great symbol. A fact that I can never stress to a worthy extent. And let us not forget about the thousands that died as well. Stuff happens and all you can do is regroup and keep moving. But it is good to know, as we all found out, that we all stuck together and handled the situation with flying colors. Hearing on the news how everyone was pitching in and helping out can have a strange magical effect on a person. Personally, it made me feel good, no, proud to be an American. It also gave me confidence in myself in that if all these people can pull through hell, then maybe I can deal with a little discomfort once in awhile. It also reminded me that even though there is great evil in the world, there are also good people around to try and do something about it. And that is enough to keep others like me going. When it came to the first anniversary, watching the documentaries and video clips brought back the very emotions that I and many others felt exactly a year ago and I am sure it will still have the same effect for years to come. No matter how you spell it, just watching the towers getting destroyed is such a powerful image to see. But in some way, I am glad in seeing it again because it also reminded me of the good that happened after. Not only did these events affect me emotionally on the day, but after such a tremendous event like 9/11 ever happens in the world, I would be very hard pressed to not ever find any ripples in my day to day lifestyle. The thing is, it makes you think twice about things. It kind of opens your eyes. For example, I’m a gamer, and there are things you do in video games, and I am not saying that all games do this or do this in a shallow manner or give you no reasons at all in doing them, like blowing stuff up, destroying things, and killing things. And I am not saying that I never thought about these things before, but it makes you wonder even more about reasons of why you are doing these things, like are you on the good side. I’m not going to say names, but there are even games out there where you can play the bad side, or more specifically, terrorists. Before, when I played as the bad side it was like “so what, I am the terrorists, do the objectives and play the game”. But now its like if I choose to be the bad guys, does that say something about who I am? Of course, the answer is it does not, it is just a game, but the thought is now in the back of my head. Occasionally you can hear sly comments from friends in the room who are watching you play like “ooh, you are a terrorist, you know what that means” and then a kind hearted laugh. Sure it is a joke, but it does refer back to 9/11. And if you really want to nit-pick, there is a game out there where you can actually invade New York City and take control of the World Trade Center through force. It was made before 9/11, but now that one level is all taboo in the public’s eye. At first when I played it for the first time, I did not think much of it – I just did what I had to do. But when I went back to play it again, well, lets just say that that little voice of conscience was having a field day. Nevertheless, it is still a game, and so that it does not sound like I am bashing games, you do play the good side in them. But the issue is not about games, the issue is that as you can see, 9/11 effected even the little things in my life, not just what I see in the news. The world is a very crazy place. Everything I do, see, and experience in it can change me forever. I was never “in” these events, but watching them progress through a live feed on TV was enough to make me feel like I was there. It is impossible and ridiculous to say that 9/11 never had an effect on my life. The experience gives you more of a conscience on certain matters and makes you think twice about things. It was an event that was large scale in consequence as well as personal. I will never forget what happened or how I felt. The fact that reminders are around every day help in that aspect. Yet, from this tragic event also came good. I will not let the past determine what I will become, but I will let it influence what I will be. For one thing, it is influencing me to be a better person. |
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Post by palla on Sept 20, 2003 0:59:44 GMT -5
That was a very powerful essay, Francis, and even though it wasn;t what I normally would read (being an essay adn all) I liked it.
Any chance you could let us in on what the teacher thought?
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Post by BugHunter on Sept 25, 2003 20:20:16 GMT -5
Well Mrs. Reider hasn't finished grading our essays yet. But I'll tell you the grade when i get it.
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Post by palla on Sept 25, 2003 21:51:00 GMT -5
You've got Ms. Rider? Hah, I've got her too. Of course, my essay was on a book I had read, as Dan can tell you seeing as he was the person to edit it.
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